Here are the requested agreements when you sign up to be an NGL Friend.
Your “Become a Friend Journey” begins!
The following four sections are intended to initiate the process of alignment between you and NGL. Please take your time reading them. Our intention in communicating with you in this way is to bring clarity to your involvement in NGL as a Friend and for that clarity to live in both your mind and in your body. The more clearly you understand the invitation by which you are welcomed into NGL, the more ease we anticipate having in meeting our purpose together. For us, NGL Friends contributes to our intent to practice openness and build relationships that will mutually support our collaboration towards nonviolent global liberation.
Requests to Friends from the NGL community
As we mentioned in the introduction to Join NGL Friends, we have a number of requests of you that we want you to engage with seriously as you decide whether being an NGL Friend is a fit for you.
The overall principle we are asking of you is that you recognize the limits of our collective resources as a community, and adopt the attitude of reverence and “do no harm.” We have worked for a long time with much care to create this space. We want it to be as welcoming as we know how, and we know it’s not perfect.
We want to learn from and with you, and our capacity is limited to engage with you beyond what we offer generally. We ask that you act with awareness of being a guest in our community. We have attempted to offer as much guidance as we can to support your journey into and within NGL, and we may have not given sufficient clarity.
If so, let us know when we ask for feedback, and we will aim to find a way to offer more guidance in new ways. We deeply believe that you will learn and get a sense of belonging from attending calls and we ask that you do this with care for all of our specific requests (which mostly focus on your overall intention and focus, not concrete actions):
- Nurture deep respect, curiosity, and openness to the power of togetherness and operating in gift based on willingness.
- Honor our space by acting with awareness and care, with us, for our limited resources by:
- having as few expectations as possible in terms of individual guidance, support, and attention;
- lending your energy to support what is happening;
- channeling what you want to question or challenge to opportunities that we will provide in spaces specifically designated for this kind of exchange;
- as a way of supporting our capacity to focus on our own relationships and purpose for our meetings, muting yourself and having your video off on all meetings except for designated moments when we ask to hear from you. (Note: for coaching calls, with their different purpose, we welcome you to participate fully.);
- When you want to share with others about being an NGL Friend:
- share your excitement, what you are learning and why you are happy to be an NGL Friend, so that other people might want to become NGL Friends too;
- honor the importance that the process to become an NGL Friend has in sustaining what we do by only sharing documents and links you have access to when there is explicit agreement to do so with the D&M Team member you are collaborating with.
Conflict engagement, including termination of an NGL Friend’s access – terms & process
In order to become an NGL Friend we are asking you to accept that the Conflict Engagement (CE) system applies to you in your relation with NGL. This section is longer than others, because we are aiming to attend to what often destroys groups: lack of attention to the core significance of attending to conflict in conscious and proactive ways.
While laying out the entirety of the CE system here would be overwhelming, we want to give you a taste of how our system functions as you consider whether this would be a fit for you:
- we base ourselves on the assumption of innocence throughout the system (see the Nonviolent Core Commitment #8);
- we see conflicts as an integral part of life and an opportunity for learning in any community;
- we recognize that under patriarchal conditioning we almost always need support when we are in conflict;
- we trust in our shared capacity to find solutions that work for everyone;
- we offer specific processes and types of support to D&M Team members to engage with conflict .
In preparation for inviting people to join as NGL Friends, we began conversations about two additional topics that are still in developments:
- due to the limited resources of the community, we do not have the capacity to offer any active support with conflicts that arise between NGL Friends. We do, however, have learning resources available and reflection questions that you can use to work your way through a conflict;
- when conflicts arise between a member of the D&M Team and an NGL Friend, we do aim to include that within what the CE system covers. In this case, the process can be activated by any of the parties;
- as no group can include “everyone” we recognize that under rare and extreme conditions, we may choose to terminate someone’s NGL Friend access. We are still developing the criteria and processes that would lead to activating this, with the aim to infuse it with as much care, clarity, integrity, and empathy as possible.
Knowing we are surrounded by a community that is consciously interacting with NGL is an integral part of our resourcing. All NGL Friends are requested to contribute financially to NGL only if you are able, through one-time contributions or on a monthly basis. We ask that the amount of the contribution be consciously decided. Given this is a gift economy, we are completely and totally open to the amount being zero ($0) if even a small monthly contribution would compromise your ability to attend to your or your family’s ongoing basic needs. If you have the capacity to contribute and not the willingness to contribute, it likely isn’t a fit for you to become an NGL Friend, because we want to engage with people who want to contribute to us, whether or not they can.
Almost the entirety of the work that’s been done so far within NGL has been done by us while stretching deeply in our own capacity to sustain ourselves without receiving almost no money from NGL. We are longing for relief from that, and the possibility of nourishing ourselves while doing this work is exciting to us, as is the possibility of expanding our capacity to do even more work as we become more resourced.
Our sustainability, even while many NGL Friends might not be able to contribute anything, will likely arise from many people contributing very small amounts (e.g. $1 a month, especially if you are coming from the Global South), a significant number of people contributing larger amounts (e.g. $30 a month), and a few people contributing much larger amounts (e.g. $1,000 a month) to create sufficiency.
Creating a sustainable base of recurring contributions rather than one-time contributions is what will provide us with ongoing resourcing and stability. One-time contributions are like infrequent injections of fuel while ongoing, monthly contributions are what form the basis of our capacity to do our work over time. We request that you consider making a monthly contribution instead of a one-time contribution, no matter how small the amount, if you have the capacity and willingness to do so.
If you are willing and able to contribute, please click below to get to the PayPal window, pick your number, and then tick the “Make this a monthly donation” box. After you complete your registration, you may change your monthly amount at any time from within your control panel.
Thank you for your support and interest in NGL.
Data Processing & Information Sharing (GDPR)
Before you enter more personal data we want to inform you that in accordance with Article 13 of the GDPR:
– the administrator of the personal data collected in this form is Bay Area Nonviolent Communication (BayNVC), P.O. Box 22872, Oakland, CA 94609, United States.
– your personal information is collected for the following purposes:
– processing of your personal data is necessary to deliver our service to you, without this data we are unable to register you as an NGL Friend.- collected data will be stored as long as you are registered as NGL Friend and for 3 month after your unsubscribe as NGL Friend, for claiming and defending against claims, unless longer period is required by law.
– you have the right to request to update or correct your personal information or to withdraw or limit your consent.– you have the right to data portability, i.e. that on your request your data will be sent directly to another company, where technically feasible.- your personal data will be transferred to recipients, who will indicate the legal basis and legal interest, as well as to the following categories of entities: accounting firms, law firms, IT firms, public bodies resulting from the obligation to provide access on the basis of separate law.
– you have the right to lodge a complaint with the supervisory authority.
Thank you for becoming an NGL Friend!
You will receive an email to confirm your subscription, please make sure you click the “Activate your account” link in that email. If the email hasn’t arrived, please check your spam folder. If you still can’t find it, please contact us.
Once you have confirmed, you can log-in to your NGL Friends account via the menu.
Within your account you can
- View our calendar to attend calls
- View our requests to NGL friends regarding participation in calls
- Change your contribution settings
- Access information to support your journey toward joining the design team
- View our systems documents and learn more about how NGL works
We look forward to seeing you soon!